When the sky is the limit....you shouldn't be ashamed

It's been awhile since I've been asked a question that I didn't know how to answer when I first heard it. Dajon asked me if I was ashamed of him or our situation. Had he asked me if I was ashamed of him I would have immediately said No, because I'm not. But I had to think about the question. I had to think about how to respond. I had to ask myself again the same question he had just asked me. Then I told him how I felt. I told him that I loved him and that I was not at all ashamed of our situation. In fact I have so much more respect for him as a man and as the father of my child. The respect came with the changes he made before this incarceration. The respect came the day we made the promise to always remove our son from our own personal differences so that we could give him all the love and support parents should give their children. The respect came the day we sat in the doctors office during my pregnancy and said we would never address each other as 'baby mama' and 'baby daddy'. There are so many examples I could give however the greatest of them all is when he accepted responsibility for his past actions in the streets. This acceptance is the only way to live. Like I have said before change doesn't start the day you come home, it starts the day you go to prison.

During this conversation we again spoke on shame. He asked me why is it that all the celebrities and people who have the opportunity to be seen or heard through the media talk about their successes but they never speak about their mistakes/failures. Dajon has had the last 8 months to reflect on his mistakes and the greatest lesson he has learned is that he never truly accepted his faults. He never took time to reflect on how his bad decisions have caused him to miss the chance to pursue some of his dreams........He would have made a great chef, and still can someday. Dajon had many many positive changes in his life. I'm really proud of him and where he is in life. I'm not proud that he had to learn certain lessons in life from behind bars however I am proud that he is not giving up on life. I am proud that he realizes he has a purpose in life. Proud that I have given him more than 1 reason to want to come home and stay home forever. I can not be ashamed of a man who has asked God to forgive him, asked his family to forgive him and he him self has forgiven the person from his past that truly brought about this case. A man who he hasn't seen in almost 3 yrs. Dajon has a good heart and his inner peace allowed him to forgive in order for him to be forgiven. I can't be ashamed of a man who already is looking forward to coming home and starting over vowing to never go back. That is a vow he has never taken before. That is a vow that was shared between him and the only man on this earth that can judge him, God. So who am I to shame him?

My final response was NO, baby I am not ashamed of you. I am not ashamed of our situation. This situation will make both of us stronger because it's different this time. I can't turn my back on him, ever because hat would be like turning my back on our son. i can't turn my back on him because I still have work to do. The same way he support my decision to further my education, it is now my turn to support him and help him pursue whatever advantages he is able to gain.
The sky is the limit. All things are possible through Christ. Prison separates you from the people you love and being separated by bars is not a reason to be ashamed.